Ponderingwithjames

The Parable of the Extraordinary Soap | December 1, 2011

There once was a man who developed and distributed a most extraordinary soap.

Unlike other soaps, which only remove current dirt, the most extraordinary soap removed all history of uncleanness and was able to protect against and even wash away future stains. Only one treatment was required and a person would be completely and forever clean.

Naturally, despite initial skepticism about the claims made by the developer and distributor, the most extraordinary soap caught on quickly.

As it became more and more widely accepted, there was a proportional adverse affect to the business of the ordinary soap distributor. Seeing his sales curve declining ever downward, the ordinary soap distributor set out to destroy his most extraordinary competitor.

Knowing that he could not compete in a direct face-off, the ordinary soap distributor used several independent plans, rumors and marketing schemes to boost his own standing and undermine the most extraordinary product.

He hired mercenaries to intimidate the sales force and destroy the warehouse and manufacturing plant  (this actually had an oddly backward effect; the plant was back and in full force only three days after being completely razed to the ground, and all but one of the sales force were changed from being somewhat timid to wildly enthusiastic).

He hired a group of experts to teach people that it was not possible to become truly clean forever (he began marketing a special “maintenance soap” to help people who had used the most extraordinary soap remain clean).

He hired another group of experts to teach people that the only way to properly use the most extraordinary soap was to first bathe and get cleaned up (he began marketing a special pre-cleaning process with a confusing regimen of classes and follow-up work and a large number of bath salts and cleansers and processes to be used before using the most extraordinary soap).

He hired another group of experts to teach people that the most extraordinary soap was unnecessary; claiming that dirt, stains and soil were actually non-existent and illusory; that the most extraordinary soap distributor was a fraud (he even distributed posters of himself inviting people to join him in eternal soaplessness).

The most extraordinary soap distributor continues unabated to this day, ever reminding people that they will one day emerge from the bath either in genuine cleanliness or intricate artifice and that they should choose wisely.

He further recommends choosing quickly, as he will be removing his product from the marketplace one day soon.

Indeed.

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